I'm Claustrophobic

Normally, I won't do a double post in a day, but this is an exception.

I left for Chile the day after the NBA All Star game in Vegas. It's not going to be remembered for a great game, but the racially charged reactions to the weekend in general. Some people are talking about how unsafe and dangerous it was, and others we saying how it wasn't that bad. And to be honest, I have no idea about how it actually was. I wasn't there and I've heard so many different summaries of the weekend.

Usually, these post all-star game columns are pretty standard, they're devoid of any liveliness. The NBA All-Star game is a break for all people involved with the NBA (save the hosts/commissioner). But this year was different. What happened in Vegas became a headline in every sports page, and within the columns, the subject of race/racism was either touched on/glossed over/or delved into. And for one of the first times in my life, I am so emotionally filled, I'm not sure how to react. There have been guidlines on so many sides as to how to react to race, how to write about it, how to think, how to behave, that I feel completely claustrophobic.

I keep seeing reactions, emotionally charged (as it should be, it's important) and every single person has some sort of knock on another person's writing/writing style/thought process. If you want to read any of this, check out Scoop Jackson ( http://sports.espn.go.com/espn/page2/story?page=jackson/070228 ) and Bill Simmons ( http://sports.espn.go.com/espn/page2/blog/index?entryDate=20070302&name=simmons ) arguments on ESPN.com, or Jason Whitlock's on sports.aol.com, or FreeDarko.com (or any of their writers, D-Wil has been one of the more prolific, http://dwil.wordpress.com/2007/03/04/more-all-star-week-fallout-deconstructing-bill-simmons/ ). It's become apparent to me that there is no right way to handle race. Some people's idols in this fight for equality are other peoples demons. It seems like, not only can't you please all the people, you can't even please a quarter of the people. It's been so dissected that it now seems impossible to respond. But after reading it seems like there are some things I should say.

This is all of course knowing full well, that I am completely open to advice, I am a white male, therefore I do not understand the difficulties of being a minority in any respect (black, hispanic, gay, women, etc.). And because I recognize that I don't know much, this is a perfect time to give me perspective. So with that, here I go with things I don't get.

1. This has popped up many times and I've never understood it. Most recently while watching "The Wire" with a dialoge between Bunny Colvin and Carcetti and with all this hoopla around hoops. It's the notion that, even though a person is a died in the wool racist, at least they respect him because they knew where he stood. It's better than those liberal "I understand their plight" people.

What the fuck? I mean really, I understand George W. Bush's position, but I think he's a fucking moron. I don't respect him, because he hasn't learned anything. He keeps running things into the ground. I really hope someone black responds to this. I have to know, because of all minorities I've only heard it from black people. I've never heard a woman say "I know he's a mysogynist and a wife beater but I respect him because atleast I know where he stands." That sounds ridiculous.

2. Bill Simmons is probably a little racist and in his style, he's always good for 1-2 racial cringe sentences per week.

3. Cracker is racially charged, yeah it doesn't have nearly the effect as writing nigger, but it does have some racist element to it. I've had people call me cracker and it definitely didn't feel the same as someone calling me white.

4. I'm relatively naive when it comes to racism in context to Black and white (Hawaii and California, not very large black populations) and it was therefore a revelation when I learned that the white control of the appropriate black man's response. I guess I never really thought of it, partly because I grew up with a very calm family and always felt awkward in the presence of vocal anger, but I now notice how white people will dismiss a black person if he raises his voice. Not everyone can be Martin Luther King Jr. and Mahatma Ghandi, and if I'm correct Malcom X sure seemed to get his point across. It's something that I've probably fucked up before, but now I'm aware of it and I'll try to handle it better next time.

5. After spending time in other countries, I've learned that a lot of people laugh at terms like african-american but not asian. I have no idea why this is. I was talking the other day with some people and I used the term african-american (actually africano-americano, but you get the idea) and they were like, "why do you call them (sorry for the use of them/they, if I were smarter I'd think of a better way to put that ) that? They aren't from Africa, the are American and Black." I really had no answer for that, but when I said someone was asian (note not even asian american) no one even blinked. I have no idea why this happened, but it did. It was strange for some people to allow this continental descendancy from one group but not the other. I'm completely clueless (naturally).

6. Hip Hop culture gets a horrible wrap. I mean its not like they are doing anything worse than what rock and roll has done for ages (i.e. let's do drugs, sleep with lots of babes and enjoy our money). I mean that's one of the mottos with Rock and Roll ("Sex, Drugs, and Rock and Roll"). Could you imagine if the hip hop culture came out with a motto like that, they'd be crucified. And for all those who say how much better the lyrics used to be, I really don't buy it, you find what you are looking for.

I guess I'm just beginning to realize that things are never going to be perfect, I mean it just isn't going to happen, you'll have good stretches but when it comes down to it, I don't know anybody that is perfect. Every one is going to fuck up something some time, it's just what we do. You look at anything you've ever done. Even when improving rapidly, you still have hang ups and fuck ups. Steps backwards. The goal is just to keep trying. I mean in the last hundred and fifty years there has been the freedom of slavery, women's suffrage, civil right's movement. All that has happened so recently, and we are in one of the most developed, intelligent countries in the world. I mean even right now in the states we are fighting over Gay Marriage, doesn't that seem like something that should be in the same civil right's movement.

It seems our next step, the one that will please the most people, is if we start evaluating every person as a person and not as a representative of their race. It seems like that's what happens with white people. If someone does something bad its just that person. But if someone of another race, it seems like its easy to find it in the papers, without name and just the race of the person. Maybe if we change this habit, we'll start fixing things faster. It won't be perfect, but its an improvement.